Need Sleep? 7 MORE Tips!

 We all need sleep. Especially before we die.  And when there's nothing left to watch on TV or YouTube.

7 MORE Tips!

Credit:BarbBest

 1 - Don't eat an additional large meal after dinner or for two hours before going to bed. This will make your evening so boring, you're more likely to nod off.2 - Flush your cell phone down the toilet. I know... blasphemy!3 -  Don't let the cat nap during the day - at all.  This is a biggie. Perhaps caffeine in the catnip?4 - A day chock full of multi-tasking can fray your nerves. Picture a pinball machine on steroids... that's your brain. Chewing gum and (insert ONE activity) is the only good multi-tasking option.  (TIP: Chewing gum and flossing - not a good choice.)5 - Family members can be noisy. Fake a business trip and go to a hotel.  This can prove to be expensive. 6 - If you're a vegan, don't count sheep. Maybe Mexican jumping beans? Or kale chips? Or Skittles?7 - Don't fall for the Nora Ephron movie "Sleepless In Seattle." It romanticizes insomnia. And I LOVE it! Bonus - Stop with the studies! Homework (your kid's) is a top cause of your sleeplessness. Credit: sleep-debt.com Obviously, we all want a good night's sleep...

7 TIPS - WHAT NOT TO DO

1 - Don't read the New York Post crime blotter as your bedtime reading. The grotesque stories will sneak into your sexy sweet fairy dreams and turn them into a night terror, perhaps a myocardial infarction.2 - Don't drink a double espresso, a Red Bull, or more wine than your body weight divided by 2.5.3 - Don't sleep with your cell phone unless you are planning to marry it. Make sure it doesn't want children.4 - "The family bed" is a lovely idea as long as your "kids" are not any two canines over 15 pounds each or one cat with a bladder problem and control issues.5 - A sleep mask is an option if you want to block out all the light in the room. Unfortunately, it does not darken the freaky laser light show playing on your eyeballs when you have a killer migraine.6 - Avoid exercising right before you go to sleep. WTF avoid exercising all day if you can.7 - Don't let the bed bugs bite. Translation - don't stay at a hotel in New York City.Bonus - Try aromatherapy to relax. Lavender is my favorite. Sure beats inhaling body odor and doggie breath :)- Sweet Dreams!100 Fast & Funny http://amzn.to/YN4Xhj        Creative Commons LicenseI Feel Your Pain by Barb Best is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License

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